1 To every thing there is a a season, and a b time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 A a time to be born, and a time to b die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to a laugh; a time to b mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to a get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to a rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep b silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to a hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
11 He hath made every thing a beautiful in his time: also he b hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the c work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.
17 I said in mine heart, God shall a judge the righteous and the wicked: for there is a time there for every purpose and for every work.
A Life Changing Event happens in your life...
There are normal stages of grieving. They do not necessarily happen in the recorded order. We shift from one to the other and back and forth until the work of grieving is done increasingly and finally completely.
Grief is a "season" and a "time" to be born, to die, plant, pluck up, kill, heal, break down, build up, weep, laugh, mourn, dance, cast away stones, gather stones together, get, loose, keep, embrace, refrain from embracing, speak, be silent, love, hate, a time of war, and a time of peace.
There is a time to look for the beauty amidst the devastation - it is usually not soon. There is a time to leave judgment to the Holy Ones, as well as those we as a society have charged with the responsibility of judging and meting out justice.
LIFE CHANGING EVENT!
Numbness/Relief
Denial
No awareness of feelings
Powerlessness
Can't believe what happened
Huge relief... even joy sometimes
Anger Inward/Outward
The "Why me?!" stage
Resentment
Bitterness
Irritability
Snappy with others
Bargaining/Guilt
The "Yes but..." stage
"What if..."
"If only..."
Want to get other opinions
True Grief/Depression
Feel the finality of the life changing event
Know the real enormity of the event
Anguish
Agony
Hearache
Hearbreak
Sadness
Hopelessness
Deep depression
Options
Begin to imagine some alternatives
Can see glimmerings of choices still available
"Where to from the changed here?"
Slight feelings of "light"
Hope
Acceptance
Can see some of the blessings of the experience
Accept self as changed forever
Accept circumstances as changed forever
Feel some forgiveness of self
Feel some forgiveness of the "other/s"
Integration
Event becomes a “part of personal history”
(It can take two to five years to reach this point)
Be patient - with your Body, Mind and Spirit
Be patient - with the Bodies, Minds and Spirits of the others in your life who are also grieving in their own way, according to their own time-table.
“Weeping is the most honest expression of true grief. Tears bring cleansing as if the emotional wound was being physically washed.” – Leslie Hands
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